I remember a time when I used to say I wanna do this - but I will wait until I'm married to do it with my husband! Who even says that?! 

Well I did. 
In my idealist, perfect world my husband was gonna like all the things I liked and would spend his time doing exactly that with me. (Yeah probably not really gonna happen) And I would wait until then to do them. 

I've come back to earth now though, learnt a few things and still learning. Learning things like: YOU DON'T HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL YOU'RE MARRIED TO ENJOY LIFE!!!

Sometimes as ladies it's easy to feel like our life only starts when we are married or in a relationship and we should wait for that to happen before we can really live life. Life isn't about sitting around and doing nothing while you wait, but about being proactive whilst waiting. If you did nothing but waited all day for 'that day' you would have wasted a lot of valuable time. 

Like seriously. Marriage is definitely a blessing. A true reflection of God's beauty. However I'm not going to wait until I'm married to enjoy life anymore, and here are some reasons why you shouldn't either: 


1. You Could Miss Out
If you sit waiting around for Mr Right you may just end up missing out on the right door, opportunity or experience. 

A relationship is supposed to add to your life - but not necessarily something you put your life on hold for or wait for to bring excitement. Of course it'll be exciting but you've also got to make life interesting for yourself and not wait for someone to come along and do it for you. If you wait for marriage or a relationship before pursuing certain things you may miss out on greatness. 


2. You Really Could Miss Out
Just to emphasise the previous point because it's soooo true.  

By waiting until marriage to enjoy life you potentially run the risk of not really meeting people and not meeting people means you may not meet any guys, hence not meeting your guy to get married to. A slight cycle which will never end. Say for instance you like travelling, you could also meet a guy who likes travelling WHILST travelling. Meaning that mutual interests could bring you together. I heard a story of a blogger who met her now husband via her blog, He was a writer too and stumbled upon it. If she never blogged she probably would have never met him. 

This isn't to say you'll meet a guy through common interests - but it's definitely possible. So don't wait to pursue something when you're married. Do it NOWWW!! 


3. Life Will Be Boring
If you're just sitting and waiting for things to happen to you in your life, then life will be boring. 
That's all. You don't want to live a boring, mundane life hoping that things are gonna somehow come to you because you're waiting. 

Make life exciting for yourself. Don't wait for someone to create excitement for you. You don't want to go through life waiting for marriage and missing out on so many opportunities because you're too busy thinking about when Mr. Right is going to come your way. This single time could be used productively....to travel, get hobbies, learn a skill, build a career or a business. Do some things NOW at least then once you're married with kids you won't sit there singing your shoulda, coulda, wouldas. 


#ModernLadyhood 
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At this point in life I'm realising that in order to go far I need to take more risks and to get to a level of greatness I need to step out my comfort zone. 

Sticking to your comfort zone gets really boring. If you never take any risks or step out of the ordinary then life will be pretty repetitive. And sometimes the bigger the risk the bigger the reward. Risk taking is all about experiencing all that life has to offer. 

Which is why I've made a list of things I will be doing to be a successful risk taker: 

1. Measure out The Gains verses The Loss 
When taking risks it's important to weigh up the things you could lose verses that which you'll gain. If what you will gain is worth a lot more than what you could potentially lose, then go for it!  If something like losing your comfort is one of your reasons then push that aside and take the risk. Do your research and preparation, weighing up whether it will be worth the risk. 

2. View it as your only shot 
Treat stepping out of your comfort zone and taking a risk like it's your only shot. If you treat it like it's your only chance you'll be so determined that it is achievable. Whatever it is you want to do there may be some difficulties but it's your decision whether to allow the difficulties to outweigh the amazing experiences you could have. 

3. Have faith in yourself 
Even if other people don't believe in your abilities or the risk you're thinking of taking the most important thing is that you believe and have enough faith to know it'll work out and will be worth it. If you want to go for a promotion or take extra study but you're told you aren't qualified or educated enough, remember why you're doing it and you're capable of anything you put your mind to. 
Okay there may be some hiccups or forks in the road but that is normal and all part of the journey. Which brings us into our next point. 

4. Failure is all part a of the process 
Don't see failure as the final destination. But see fit as a stepping stone for success. An Oprah quote states "Think like a Queen. Queens are not afraid to fail. Failure is another steppingstone to greatness" And this is sooo true. Failure is not anything you can avoid, but you can change your perspective and see failure as a way to learn from what you've done in the past and do it differently. Use the negative and turn it into a positive 

5. Be true to yourself 
And lastly be true to who you are. There's no point in taking a risk that you don't really want to do or its based on an emotional decision, or not really thought through. Choose risks that have the will make you happy and will improve your life. 


If there's something you've wanted to do for the longest time and can't stop thinking about it but have been afraid to do it. There is no better time than now. Take risks for the things you love and for what would ultimately bring a reward to your life. 

#ModernLadyhood 

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Note: The fact that you can be 40 and look like that (image above) makes it very clear that 40 is definitely the new 30, and 30 being 20.

Life goes by sooo fast it's crazy. The fact that you could be celebrating your 16th bday one day then the next you're pushing 30! It's all crazy and a lot to deal with at times, enough to make a person want to hide in a corner begging it to stop. But thing is it's not gonna stop. We are going to keep aging whether we like it or not. 

Sometimes as humans we get so consumed with our age particularly in the areas of getting married, building a career, having a successful business, buying a house and having kids. It's all pressure to get all of that done by a specific age, to the point where we stop enjoying life.

So here are 3 reasons not to get too caught up on your age and just live and enjoy life:


1. You're as young as you feel

Yep. We all age but it's down to the individual whether they will allow age to be a limitation or not. This isn't an excuse to say you should act like a kid or in order to forget your age. But simply it's your choice whether you're gonna allow yourself to be focussed on your age or just live your life. 

Some people associate age with not being able to do certain things because they have missed their moment. But if you want to go after or pursue something, then do it! You're never too old. If you want to go back to school. Do it!! Nobody is saying you can only be in your early 20s to study. You're never too old to go after a dream. 


2. Opportunities aren't limited to age

There ARE some industries such as the Modelling industry who place an age limit on an opportunity, but that isn't everyone's dream anyway. So you are fine!  

It's easy to believe you can only achieve certain goals or by a certain age, and if you have not accomplished it by then that you've missed it. It  inspires me whenever I hear Mark Zuckerberg became a millionaire at 22, and a billionaire at 23 because it highlights the fact that you're never too young to reach success, However it inspires me even more that Oprah made a million at 32, and a billion at 49. There's no age limit to success. Not that 49 is old . But a lot of people would have given up on a dream by then if it didn't work out after they'd passed a certain age. 

Opportunities doesn't care how old you are 


3. Nobody cares as much as you do 

Okay people might say stuff about your age, but at the same time it's up to you whether you'll let it affect you or not. Just get on with life and forget about your age. So what if you're 25 and haven't got to where you wish you had or you're 30 and not married yet. 
It's honestly great to have goals and work towards achieving them by a specific age as a guideline but if it doesn't work out exactly how you imagined don't beat yourself up about it. 

Life isn't a competition so what the girl next door has done at 21 or 25 or 30 has nothing to do with you. You just do you and work according to your own timescale. Imagine if we all had the same life timescale. Like would be pretty boring and conventional. I say we all live our life not focussing on our age. Obviously have goals and dreams but enjoy the journey on the way there and don't compare your timeline to someone else's. Life is too short to be in a competition with people. Work according to your own lifeline. 


- Modern Ladyhood

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I've decided to change my way of thinking and start dreaming bigger than I usually would in the past. You may feel like your dreams aren't achievable or people might think they're completely ridiculous, but trust in your vision. If you're dreaming big keep dreaming big! But if you're not and you know you should be here are reasons why you need to start today!!!! 


You Only Get One Life (YOGOL)
Do you remember the YOLO concept? Yeah it's similar to that only it's not giving you an excuse to do crazy stuff and live wildly. We don't get much time on earth... 80 or 90 years if that. Why shouldn't you dream big? If you have a dream -- PURSUE IT! Don't let anyone tell you it's too big a dream. 

We live in a society where people think dreams are too big. A kid at school could tell their teacher they want to be famous or become a footballer or a singer or a millionaire which is often laughed off and ridiculed. Don't allow someone else's doubt to erase your faith! 

It's your dream. You pursue it!!! You only get one life. If you have a dream -- GO AFTER IT!! 


Mediocrity is boring  
Mediocrity is the worst enemy of greatness so if you have a dream or you know you have a calling why would you throw it away to live a mediocre life? God hasn't created you to be ordinary, He wants you to be extraordinary because that's exactly what He is. There are no rules in life which state you have to live a normal, ordinary, regular, simple life if you don't want to.Some people don't mind, but others want something different, something more!

You don't have to stay in your hometown just because you were born there. 
You don't have to stay in the job field you majored in. 
You don't have to follow the timeline the world has set for you. 
You don't have to live a life where you just come to earth to get an education, start and family, buy a house, retire, then leave. 

If you want to stand out and do something different, or make a change in this world or be a voice. You CAN! Nobody is telling you to live an ordinary life. And even if people are, remember it's YOUR life not theirs. 


There are no limits 
You can dream because there aren't any limits. There isn't a cap on how much money you can earn or the places you want to go to or the number of businesses you want to start or the amount of books you want to write, or the amount of lives you want to impact. 

There are no limits!!! Anything is possible as long as you believe. There is nothing impossible for God and there's is nothing impossible for you especially if He is with you!! Don't allow people to make you feel incapable, or not good enough or not experienced enough to pursue your dream. 


If you want a change then make a change because otherwise nothing will EVER change! 
You don't want to look back on your life in 10, 20 or 30 years from now WISHING! Wishing you had taken the step of faith, wishing you had dreamed bigger, wishing you hadn't allowed people's opinions to stop you from making a difference, wishing you had just left your comfort zone to step into a zone of greatness. 

It's never too late to pursue a dream if you have one! In fact the time is now!! As you are reading this! If you have a dream that you're not pursuing. Go do it now!!! It may be hard. It may be challenging. You may have responsibilities, a family to take care of or a home to run. But I GUARANTEE it will be worth it. If you don't ever try you will never know. Don't live another day full of 'shoulda, coulda, wouldas' 

And don't be that person who spends the rest of their life wishing they had followed their heart, eyeing up someone's blessing saying "That could have been me -- I had that idea years ago". GO FOR IT NOW!!! The world is waiting for you!!! 


#ModernLadyhood 



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It is the 3rd month into the year already! You've probbaly got goals, whether you've written them down or have them stored in your head here are 10 things to remember whilst chasing after your dreams. The pursuit towards your dreams and goals is not always easy, however it'll be worth it once you get there. 

So here are some things I have learnt and are applicable when you've got a vision you're working towards...


1. Don't Give Up When It Gets Hard 
It'll be hard, nobody said achieving success was easy, if it was then everyone would do it. When progress is slow, and the process is not turning out the way you imagined the thought of giving up on your dreams or goals feels way too easy. Like the easy way out. 
But I found the best thing to do when you feel like giving up is to visualise the life you would like to live and then continue working towards your plan to make it your reality. 

Also asking yourself these questions:


- Why did I want to pursue this goal to begin with— and has anything changed?
- Would my life be better if I gave up on this goal?


If your life would be better once you've achieved this goal then keep pursuing it. It's only a matter of time until you finally see the fruits of your labour, and all you've invested will start to grow. 

“Persistence trumps talent.” – Daniel Pink. And this is so true! Be persistent even though it may be difficult. 


2. The Power of Consistency
This is one that I've learnt more recently. The necessity of consistency. If you want to be successful you have to consistent. Consistency is a major key because unless you have tried something over and over you will not be able to measure its effective and gain an understanding of what works and what doesn't work.

Whether it is consistency at work or a new business venture if you aren't consistent you won't be recognised. People will identify you by your repeated hard work and dedication and people will view you as reliable. 

Being consistent will also keep you momentum going. If you want something bad enough work hard for it, never decreasing the amount of work invested into it. 


3. Compete only with yourself
My dreams are different to yours, your goals are different to mine. 
We all have individual journeys, different places we are going so don't compete with that other person who wants something similar to you. the same way in which we are different is the same way we will utilize it differently. 

Don't look at what other people are doing and where they are in life, and whether they have achieved more than you! Instead by inspired by these people, but not envious. Use it as an example of the possible accomplishments if you work hard.  

But how they achieved their goal might turn out to be different to the way you achieve and how long it takes to reach yours. 

Stay focussed - with some of that tunnel vision and if you're going to compete with anyone - compete with your own personal best.


4. Have The End Goal In Sight 
Similar to visualising your potential life as stated in point no. 1. But write your vision down and write it plain and clearly, because without a vision it will equal failure. 

Having the end goal in sight will help when times are hard, when the struggle becomes real. Again remember why you're doing it or why you are striving for this dream. 10, 15, 20 years from now you could be pleased that you kept the vision closeby.

If an athlete gave up halfway through their race they would never know what would become of their race and what the end results would be. 

So keep running girl and have that finish line in sight. 


5. Value your time
When you're working towards a dream there is no time to spend of worthless things. Drama?..."Ain't nobody got time"

However It's easy to spend our time doing things that we think we need to do but are really a waste of time, sorry yeah like hours of instagram scrolling or binge watching reality TV shows. I once read that Beyonce has the same amount if time as everyone on the earth. Fine, she may have assistants and people helping her left right and centre but it's just an example of what can be achieved if we value our time (ouch! yeah this hurt me). 

I also read that time never comes back. Once it's gone it's gone! We may lose money, but money can be regained. But time can't.  

We live in a period where we face so many distractions, our phones, our iPads, our laptops. There's just sooo much to do and a whole world to get lost in. But if you've got goals limit the time you spend on random web browsing (and people spying). 


6. People will have opinion after opinion
Don't get distracted by naysayers; trust your vision.

You will always get those with a lot to say, with an opinion, with disbelief, with their skepticism. but IGNORE THEM!! Don't listen to them, block it out, don't let it throw you off-course. 

If you know what you're going after, go after it in faith and say "Bye" to the skeptics. They will be the same people to turn around and tell you they knew you could do it. For some people seeing is believing but you don't need those types of people around you. 


7. Never Stop Learning

You can never know enough of one topic - there is always something you can learn even if it's just miniature. So keep educating yourself. 

If you don't acknowledge the need to constantly learn new things you're ultimately denying yourself of the chance to grow. There is always something you don't know and it could help you achieve greater success in accomplishing your goals. 
Listen to what others have to say about their experiences. Learn from their achievements and their mistakes. Read books, read blogs and articles, listen to podcasts, tune into webinars, watch youtube videos. 
There is a world full of knowledge out there. And applying this knowledge in the correct way will make you incredibly wise.

8. Believe and Have faith 
There is no point in having a goal you don't believe in and you don't believe will ever happen. 
It'll be hard to achieve or even work towards a goal you don't believe in or are not passionate about. If you don't believe in your dream or your goal nobody will do it for you. 
You may have moments of feeling discouraged but that's different to totally not believing in your dream at all.

As a child whenever my mum asked me a question and i responded "I'm not sure or I don't know" My mum would say to me "If you're not sure then who is going to be sure for you". 
The answer is NOBODY. It's great to have people around you to encourage you and push you but ultimately it's your goal! It was given to you for a reason. So go get it! 

Believing is 90 percent of the win. If you believe you'll achieve your goal, no matter what the challenges, no matter what anyone else tells you...You WILL succeed!!


9. Be Active
Great you have faith! You believe in your vision but don't expect anyone to do the work for you. Nobody can be successful or reach your goals for you. You have to work hard yourself. 
Faith without work is dead. There is no point believing and dreaming but not working. If only life was that easy. If you want to work towards achieving something it's not going to happen just thinking about it, you have to physically act out the tasks necessary to achieving that goal. 

In order for a plant to grow someone had to plant it in the first place.

Sometimes it's easy to sit around wishing...wishing about your dream life, wishing for the things you want. But some wishes don't come true until you act!  



OH. So I know I said 10 keys but I could only think of 9. There are no rules over here anyway. 

Perhaps that can be the final point. 

There are no rules! There is no right or wrong way of chasing your dreams and achieving a vision. Just do it in your own way and in the way you know how, whilst remembering the points listed above. 

Exciting stuff!!! Here's to chasing dreams and catching them. Whoop!

#ModernLadyhood 
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Well it's still a New Year so it isn't too late to start to revisit that 'join the gym' resolution if that's what you vowed to. Getting into a habit is hard but they say it takes 30 days to build a habit. So how about starting now?!! Other than the fact you'll have the body you've always wanted there are many reasons to start working out this year. Here are a few...



1. Health 
Working out has a lot of health benefits, and anything that benefits you health-wise is good in the long run. It is known to increase the immune system, so less colds, coughs and sick days during the winter - and summer (I can definitely vouch) so it's worth it! It's also good for the heart and known to prevent certain diseases. You're also bound to start eating better as well, letting go of those late-night fast-food binges. Oh! And on top of all that it'll help you sleep better. And the more sleep you get the better for your body. 


2. Confidence 
As you're working on your body you'll start to feel more confidence. That thing you hate about your elbows or your arms or your legs will potentially start to disappear. You'll also start to accomplish goals you've set for yourself which will make you feel like an absolute BOSS. 


3. De-stresser
Studies have shown that exercise is a good way to release stress. During exercise a chemical called Endorphins is released (a hormone that allows us to express positivity and feel good) through our bodies. This will generally make you feel a lot happier after working out. 


4. More energy 
Do you often find yourself feeling exhausted after the smallest activity - like climbing a set of stairs? Or running for the train on your way to work, which makes your body feel like you've run 3 marathons? Well maybe you need to work out. Contrary to popular belief working out actually makes you feel a lot more energised. Yes you're using up energy to work out but eventually your body will get used to it and maneuvering those muscles. 


5. The results
And the results will just be EPIC!! Whether you want to lose weight or gain weight or get more toned and sculpted, when you do start seeing the results you'll realise how worth it it all is. It's also very rewarding knowing your efforts have results that are tangible and you will physically see. 



#ModernLadyhood 

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