Showing posts with label Love and Relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Love and Relationships. Show all posts




Firstly, this isn't about to be one of those posts to suggest you should be like Meagan Good and Devon Franklin, neither is it one which seeks to make you feel envious of the couple. But rather, things you can learn...I guess. (Or perhaps it's just our bias towards generally loving them! I dunno). Anyway...here are our actual reasons as to why....


1. They Waited
Waited for what you ask? Well I am still yet to buy this book so probably not as wised up as I should probably be - But I have read the blurb, and watched interviews leading up to the launch of their book titled,'The Wait' - speaking about how they waited for each other, waited on God and also waited to get married before having sex! 

Celibacy is definitely isn't widely celebrated in the 21st Century - soon as you do tell someone you are celibate it is usually followed with a sympathetic "Ahh, well good on you" response or a "Are you crazy?" response. But they still managed to be different from a large number of the population and do it the 'right way'. The couple spoke in interviews of how much of a positive impact it made on their relationship, by removing insecurities, the potential of being blinded by the physical or using sex to divert from real issues. 

People have probably forgotten or don't know (or maybe don't even care), but God did make sex for the enjoyment of marriage and not before it and this is something we definitely celebrate here at Modern Ladyhood *clap clap*


2. They wrote a book together
Yeah I know...more about this book! I don't know about you but a couple that can write a book together to me shows a great form of team-work!!! 
As a control freaked, perfectionist writer I literally couldn't even imagine sharing the pen with another person, someone else telling me what I wrote was wrong or I should change it! That might just be me. But even back in school I didn't like the English teacher telling me I was wrong -- I mean leave me to make up my own words in peace! Ha!

But this must have taken a huge amount of surrender on both parts. 


3. They're Hollywood but Human
I love the fact they promote things like celibacy and abstinence and loving GOD! Not very Hollywood really. It's just amazing that they are industry-focussed but still church-focussed. 
While some of hollywood are promoting crazy crazy and morrreee crazy lives these two are here talking about standing out, and not doing what the rest of the world are doing and highlighting the benefits in doing so. (Yup!)


4. They support each other 
Nowww we can't talk about how much we love them without talking about 'the incident' - yeah the incident... you know the one where that random woman shouted out to Meagan "We're going to cover up right" referring to her clothing and how inappropriate it is for the Christian world. Hmmm not the way to do it lady!

However, half of a second passes and Devon runs to her rescue, rising up in defence to protect his Queen from harm, like a Knight in shining armour ready to... (okay not exactly like that) but his response was fast, quick to defend and protect her! And that's the way it should be. The man protecting his wife!


5. They're inspirational
I have read Devon's book 'Produced By Faith' and what I loved about this book is his honesty and humility, speaking of reaching success as a Film producer, being humbled along his journey with many hiccups, but not allowing himself to forget who he is once gaining ultimate success and exposure through the production of the film 'The Pursuit of Happyness'. Generally not forgetting it was God who helped him get there, and remembering his calling to be a difference within the Film industry being both a Pastor and a Film producer. If that's not inspiring - I don't know what is. 


So I guess there are some things we can learn from the couple. Or maybe this was an excuse to do a post just for them? I don't know. Either way it's done now lol

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I remember a time when I used to say I wanna do this - but I will wait until I'm married to do it with my husband! Who even says that?! 

Well I did. 
In my idealist, perfect world my husband was gonna like all the things I liked and would spend his time doing exactly that with me. (Yeah probably not really gonna happen) And I would wait until then to do them. 

I've come back to earth now though, learnt a few things and still learning. Learning things like: YOU DON'T HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL YOU'RE MARRIED TO ENJOY LIFE!!!

Sometimes as ladies it's easy to feel like our life only starts when we are married or in a relationship and we should wait for that to happen before we can really live life. Life isn't about sitting around and doing nothing while you wait, but about being proactive whilst waiting. If you did nothing but waited all day for 'that day' you would have wasted a lot of valuable time. 

Like seriously. Marriage is definitely a blessing. A true reflection of God's beauty. However I'm not going to wait until I'm married to enjoy life anymore, and here are some reasons why you shouldn't either: 


1. You Could Miss Out
If you sit waiting around for Mr Right you may just end up missing out on the right door, opportunity or experience. 

A relationship is supposed to add to your life - but not necessarily something you put your life on hold for or wait for to bring excitement. Of course it'll be exciting but you've also got to make life interesting for yourself and not wait for someone to come along and do it for you. If you wait for marriage or a relationship before pursuing certain things you may miss out on greatness. 


2. You Really Could Miss Out
Just to emphasise the previous point because it's soooo true.  

By waiting until marriage to enjoy life you potentially run the risk of not really meeting people and not meeting people means you may not meet any guys, hence not meeting your guy to get married to. A slight cycle which will never end. Say for instance you like travelling, you could also meet a guy who likes travelling WHILST travelling. Meaning that mutual interests could bring you together. I heard a story of a blogger who met her now husband via her blog, He was a writer too and stumbled upon it. If she never blogged she probably would have never met him. 

This isn't to say you'll meet a guy through common interests - but it's definitely possible. So don't wait to pursue something when you're married. Do it NOWWW!! 


3. Life Will Be Boring
If you're just sitting and waiting for things to happen to you in your life, then life will be boring. 
That's all. You don't want to live a boring, mundane life hoping that things are gonna somehow come to you because you're waiting. 

Make life exciting for yourself. Don't wait for someone to create excitement for you. You don't want to go through life waiting for marriage and missing out on so many opportunities because you're too busy thinking about when Mr. Right is going to come your way. This single time could be used productively....to travel, get hobbies, learn a skill, build a career or a business. Do some things NOW at least then once you're married with kids you won't sit there singing your shoulda, coulda, wouldas. 


#ModernLadyhood 
Featured image via: Instagram

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That day is fast approaching!!! The day singles loath, some couples celebrate, and others feel indifferent about. 

When we were in our teen being single for Valentine's wasn't a big deal because more or less everyone your age is single - You might not get a rose or a secret Valentine, but it's fine because the next day everyone forgets about it. But what if you're single and it feels like everyone is coupled up, or engaged or married, days like Valentine's day just accentuate your singleness even more. 

However it is what you make it. If you're single, don't allow yourself to be negatively affected by a single day - it's not worth it! And here some other things not to do...


1. MOPE
Don't sit around moping on Valentine's Day, because misery loves company. Don't be all miserable, feeling sorry for yourself because frankly it's not that deep. Being single on February 14th 2016 may not have been what you envisioned for your life but being miserable all day won't make the situation any better. And being angry at the world and uploading anti-Valentines Day, anti-relationships, anti-love posts on social media will make you look crazy. So don't do it.


2. MOAN
I mean moaning and ranting feels like a good release at the time, but I've learnt that complaining about a situation over and over again only makes you feel worse in the long run. Moaning about being single becomes boring and repetitive - especially if it's to the same people. Do yourself and others a favour and stop moaning about your relationship status. And definitely don't rant on social media. It's definitely frustrating when you can't see an end in sight but it won't last forever. 


3. MESSAGE
It's probably best not to go calling your ex or messaging an ex-date a few days prior to Valentine's Day because you feel lonely. I mean by all means sending a genuine message just to say hi is fine. But don't put yourself in a vulnerable or painful situation just because you can't bear to be the only one in your social circle who isn't gonna be getting flowers. Sometimes as females when we are all in our feelings we do crazy things I know. But don't do it! You're better off single than in an unhealthy relationship. 

There are some things you won't ever forget, there are some people that won't leave your mind for a while. But spending your whole day dreaming up fantasy dates or scenarios can't be good for the soul. You broke up or didn't take it further with that person for a reason. If you didn't care until Valentine's Day then leave it in the past. 


SO WHAT YOU'RE SINGLE! Get dressed up, put some makeup on, and look beat!! Get together with your girls, enjoy the day, go out, do what you love. Romantic love isn't the only type of love out there

Instead of staying home stuffing your face with ice cream whilst staring blankly at the air (I've never done this) treat it like an enjoyable day. Yeah you'll probably see a whole load of couples out on dates carrying inflated heart shaped balloons in one hand, a bouquet of flowers in the other whilst still somehow holding hands. But don't let it ruin your day and allow yourself to be defeated and let one day get the better of you. 




- Modern Ladyhood



Featured image via: Pinterest.com
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February is always the month whereby the topic of relationships comes up often, probably because of Valentine's Day, so because of this we will kick-start with some lovey-dovey posts. 

This subject of Finding THE ONE comes up in discussion quite frequently, and often feels really weighty and pressurised easily in our 20s/30s. But here are some reasons to stop focussing on finding that ONE person...


1. THERE ARE BILLIONS OF PEOPLE IN THE WORLD

There are 7.4 billion people in the world meaning that's a pretty big selection. If we are supposed to choose one person out of a billion then that's a whole lotta pressure! 

The process of choosing to be with someone and potentially marrying them just has to have wisdom attached to it. Choosing someone who complements your life, who you can grow with, achieve goals with and ultimately become a better person, flourishing into the best version of yourself is what's most important. 


2. YOU COULD TOTALLY MISS OUT

It's so easy to turn down a load of potentials because you feel like they don't meet the requirements on your list. 

This isn't to say you should settle - clearly there are some no-brainers to your dating-selection-process. However if he has the most important things you need in a guy, but there are other random things you can't check off your list then you probably have to question whether you're being too picky. (I'm definitely learning this too). For instance if he's an inch shorter than you like or a skin shade too dark or too light or he doesn't like rom-coms when you love them - then realise it's really not that deep.


3. THERE IS NEVER A 'RIGHT ONE'

That one job, one car, one house? Hmmm. Not sure that even exists.
The One invites this false idea of perfection and as females we are pretty good at holding onto our idealistic view of what is perfect. (I am guilty). However no job, no house, no car will ever be perfect - as humans we get easily bored and hence crave something new quite often. 

The One in terms of a relationship is this idealistic view that the one will be perfect. He will be everything you've ever wanted, he will do the right things and say all the right things all the time. (Almost like your very own perfectly constructed robotic man). The person you eventually get with will most probably be right for you but he definitely won't be perfect and neither will you. 


4. YOU BECOME 'ONE' ONCE YOU'RE MARRIED

Essentially the person you marry will be your 'One' - the two will unite to become one. That's what God create marriage to be like. There are no longer two individuals but rather the two individuals come together to create oneness and unity. Becoming one emotionally, spiritually, intellectually, and financially. 

Not to say you lose yourself but you've now joined forces with another person. And because you become one with this person they become your one and you becoming their one. Interesting huh?


So it might be time to throw away your manufactured male list that includes him having to be a Chocolate 6'3 man with hazel eyes, perfect teeth, an insanely high paid job, drives a bentley, and will spend every last penny (or cent) on you. Those things are great but if you're sitting around waiting for that, only that and that alone...you're probably gonna be waiting a LOONNNG time! 



- Modern Ladyhood

Featured image via: Pinterest.com
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